Alright so we have in the bible examples of what happens when we follow God. If we lean on Him, He takes care of us. If we leave Him, we have to fend for ourselves, not that He isn't right there, but that we have left Him. In my experience, He has ALWAYS been there even when I never recognized it. I have to say though that in my view, the same applies to marriage. Here's why.
We all know that God constructed the idea of marriage. Therefore marriage is "good and very good". Marriage was created in His sight, and since He created it, we know it to be good because all things that He creates are good. We learn from the bible through it's many verses how to be a better husband or wife, which I tell you with all seriousness, to be better husband or wife usually means you have to be a better Christian first. It is through these many verses that we can recognize that marriage is important, more important than what the standard of marriage is today. I think it is safe to say that God wants us to remain married, and has given us scripture to follow, a sort of guideline, to help us remain married, knowing that our faults as man can overpower us and therefore destroy the marriage.
So why get married? In my toddler years, some of the teachings we received was that it is better to marry than to burn, I believe that scripture to be in 1 Corinthians 7th chapter. So what we were being taught was that when you become of age to be sexually active, before you start humping every woman (or man) you see, go ahead and get married. If you don't, you won't make it to heaven because you had sex before marriage. I think there is truth to that but here's what we also found. In those early years the members were getting married based on that scripture. Years later, as my understanding serves, "a lot" of those marriages fell. I wish I could define "a lot" for you but I just don't know the specific number. So why'd they fall? They married for the wrong reason. They married to have sex so that they wouldn't burn, but they weren't looking far enough past the honeymoon to say "Now what do we do"?
Which is why I said that it seems to me that it is better to become a Christian first before you become a husband or wife. Your role as husband or wife is easier when you have a committed role as a Christian. Your role as Husband or Wife is enhanced by your following as a Christian. You recognize your place, you understand your duties and more importantly, you know who you follow. And when both husband and wife follow towards the same goal, that being God and His standard/direction, your marriage is made better because you aren't following your own personal rules and regulations per se, but you follow Christ and His teachings.
Now with that said, what happens when we don't follow Christ when it comes to marriage? Well look at society. Look at our standards. Man has lowered it's standards. We accept a mother with 3 kids by 2 or 3 different daddies. We tell her it's ok, then call her, in the black community, a "strong black woman" because she's doing it all on her own. Our men become boys when they find out that their mate is pregnant, not wanting to be in his Baby Momma and child's lives. People get married, in front of God, family, and the pastor, and get divorced within a few years. If that now divorced husband and wife had kids, they go from Father and Mother in marriage to Baby Momma and Baby Daddy through the divorce. What makes them different than the other Baby Momma /Daddy who never got married? Further more, if that same now divorced Husband/Wife get married again to someone else, AND have more kids, they aren't any better than the other Baby Mommas with 2 kids by 2 different fathers, and the Baby Daddies that are spewing their seeds at every hole they can find. The term "Ex Husband" or "Ex Wife" doesn't make the situation any better. You still had sex with multiple partners either way. In marriage we wear protection to prevent more kids, out of marriage we wear our magnums to prevent kids AND disease. In marriage we know who we are coming home to, he/she is there. They are ours, and we are theirs. Out of marriage, we spend our time "looking for love". So we have to go through the process of meeting new people, enduring new personalities, filtering through the people who really won't make your life enjoyable, then we have to "get to know" someone new. You're starting over all because you ended your marriage. In some cases we remain alone not wanting to contend with the level of man or woman out there.
I don't say that marriage is easy, let me be real with you. Marriage is real. It is tough.Your wife or husband will make you scream and it won't necessarily be during the moment of ecstasy. But I tell you with conviction, if you follow God and cling to him, your marriage will survive, and you won't have to endure some of those things I mentioned when you don't follow God.
If marriage is designed by God, our being married and remaining married is glorifying God. We may not really say "Yea I'm getting married to glorify God", but our actions say just that when we show others that our God is THE God to follow when we remain married.
Let the knowledge of Christ and His teachings flourish within me like a
never ending fountain of pure water. Let His Spirit dwell within me, quickening my
spirit and strengthening me against the enemy's devices. Let His light
shine within me for His benefit as He sees fit.Let all those who pass by this page, who may read, who may understand be blessed and strengthened and let their understanding grow about Christ, and themselves.In Jesus name, Amen.
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